National Coffee Break

In reviewing my blog, I realized that I am neglecting my small, but loyal, base of readers. Nothing new for weeks. WEEKS. I'm such a horrible hypocrite (and really, is there such a thing as a virtuous hypocrite?) in that when I read other blogs, I get a little frustrated when there hasn't been a new post in the last 48 hours. Yet I'm the guy posting rerun blogs. Reruns! On a blog. They shoot bloggers for that in some countries, or they will someday -- you'd be amazed at the weird laws that exist in our little world. Fret not, loyal reader, the subject of legal recourse for lazy blogging is not my topic du jour -- no, it's one far more...well, blogworthy.

So, on this, the "middle child day" which rests between the Ides of March and St. Patrick's Day, I shall share with you my thoughts on our society's amazing ability to rally in the pursuit of all things free. This will not be as uplifting and patriotic as you might be thinking.

Starbucks. We've all seen it -- the way they stand innocently on street corners beckoning us with the venti mocha lattes and their triple espressos. You can't go more than a few blocks without those barristas luring you in with the aroma of exotic coffee beans flown in from God knows where, and sometimes there seems to be more than one of the caffeine pumping establishments at the same intersection (a phenomenon that even McDonald's hasn't mastered - yet).

My point? People love a good cup of joe. They live for it -- need it -- and like the tobacco industry, there's a conglomerate somewhere raking in cash by feeding the daily addictions of millions of people. I know a few of those people personally and watched as they waited, with giddiness usually reserved for birthdays and Christmas, for the national caffeine fix that this Seattle-based corporation bestowed upon the java drinkers of America. Yesterday, for two hours, from 10 a.m. - Noon, 7,500 or so Starbucks around these United States gave away joe, whole cups of it, for absolutely nothing.

And it struck me, we are gluttons for free - well, anything. Seriously... food, drinks, vacations, seat upgrades on your flight, those little toys in the cereal, something you get because you bought three of something else...we love it. It's like a drug. And the people who give this stuff away know it.

Were you aware that on July 11th, all the 7-Eleven stores give away 7.11 oz. slurpees? And every once in a while, Dairy Queen has free ice cream cone day? For that matter, so do the Ben & Jerry's shops. I know they're just marketing ploys -- but isn't it amazing how out of the way we will go for a 7.11 oz. slurpee or a cup of coffee or some plain vanilla cone as long as it's free? I don't think we need to go into details here, but let's just say that my daily driving route included more than the usual number of DQ's that warm breezy day.

I'll leave you with this: what is the utter joy that comes from getting something for nothing? Is it that gift-receiving buzz we all get? Is it the scrooge in all of us, happy to not part with the almighty dollars in out pockets? Is it some feeling of elevated status supported by the fact that you just walked into a commercial business, ordered their signature item, and it was handed to you without charge as if your mere presence was compensation enough? Does it matter?

Right now there is an entire box of Cheryl's cookies in the kitchen of my office. They sit, a gift from our supervisors, an odd commemoration of this "middle child day", a point wonderfully accented by the M&M cookies wrongfully ignored for the leftover Valentine's Day cookies and the shamrock cookies for tomorrow. I'm sure if there were such things as "Ides of March" cookies, they'd be there too.

And I'd eat them. Because they're free.